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<p>I got back from my short hike to find G3 sitting contentedly in his hammock. I think that was one of the best Christmas presents he’s ever gotten. It makes hanging out at the campsite more enjoyable for him. I also think hanging out in his hammock is a highlight of this trip thus far. [&hellip;]</p>

<p>I woke up early again this morning and set out on another hike while the family slept. It’s so peaceful hiking at such an early hour before anyone else gets on the trail. It was just me and the humming insects and the tweeting birds. It’s wonderful to disconnect entirely from the world even for [&hellip;]</p>

<p>I woke up early. The cicadas had quieted down, although I could still faintly hear them. G3 got up shortly after me. I made coffee and hot chocolate. G3 sipped his in his hammock. I sat by the creek enjoying the quiet while I drank my coffee and read. Kati was exhausted from the long [&hellip;]</p>

<p>And we are off… I am more apprehensive about this trip than excited. We all wanted to go out west again, but the high gas prices coupled with our shoestring budget forced us south instead. The fewer miles we drive the less gas we’ll need. But Kati really didn’t want to go south. It’s too [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Today is Dad’s birthday. If he had lived, he would have been 74. Today is also the first tournament of the 2023 tournament season. At first we weren’t going to stay in Arizona for it since G3 was supposed to leave for summer camp today. However, once we realized it was Dad’s birthday we were [&hellip;]</p>

<p>This morning we woke up at 5:30 in order to get back to the Phoenix Convention Center by 8. Maybe one of the hardest things to do after a loss is get up early to show up and cheer for friends and classmates but that’s what G3 did. It makes for a good lesson in [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Four years ago, G3 was a red belt, but the Taekwondo school he was attending was no longer challenging enough for him. He wanted more. To be exact, he wanted to compete and he wanted to learn weapons. We had no idea where to go, so we started looking online. When the online search failed [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Three summers ago, G3 and I were in the car with Mom and Dad out on Long Island. G3 asked Dad, “Would you go to Little Rock in July?” Dad answered, “Arkansas in the summer. It’s so hot. don’t think so.” G3’s forehead wrinkled, “But Grandpa, that’s where the World Championship is for Taekwondo. If [&hellip;]</p>

<p>In November of 2018, G3 competed in his first Taekwondo tournament. He took second place in Forms. Shortly after that, he declared that he would someday qualify for the World Championship. Well, he made good on that declaration and so we are now heading to Phoenix, Arizona where he will complete in Forms on Thursday. [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, Mom took us—G3, Kati, and me—on vacation to Rocking Horse Ranch Resort. She told me that when the two of&nbsp; you were on that cruise in Patagoina—the one that killed you—you told her all the things you wanted to do with G3. The list was long because you loved your grandson and you [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, On Saturday, G3 competed in the Taekwondo Northeast District Championship in Lancaster. Unlike last year, we knew he could potentially win. But winning wouldn’t be easy. This season, while he has beaten everyone in his ring at least once, he has also lost to several of the boys on other occasions. Since he [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, I’ve had a pretty good week. I’ve had two essays published. My essay “Searching the Heavens” was published in Margate Bookie’s Open Arms issue. It was the first essay I’ve written since you died that wasn’t about you. I almost feel guilty moving on and writing about other things. “Searching the Heavens” is [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, When Ancestry started testing DNA to determine ancestry, both you and Mom couldn’t wait to get tested. You—more you than Mom—were excited to find out your ethnicities. Since Mom was born in Italy, with two parents also born in Italy, she was expecting her DNA to come back 97% Italian—if not more. As [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, We escaped New Jersey briefly over the weekend and took a day trip down to Baltimore to visit Edgar Allan Poe’s house. After G3 dressed as Red Death for Halloween, we had promised him we’d take him to see Poe. And finally, we had a weekend that allowed us to make good on [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, I’ve been feeling super prickly lately. Everything bothers me. I guess that shouldn’t be surprising. This year is turning out like so many others—a new year begins, I greet it with a great deal of excitement and optimism, and as summer approaches, I’m feeling as suffocated as I did in previous years. No, [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, G3 and I visited Mom this weekend for a belated Mother’s Day. I wish we could go for the entire weekend and spend two full days, but G3’s activities make it difficult. I suppose I should be glad we get to go at all. Yesterday, was a full day. We had to get [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, G3 worked incredibly hard this year training in Taekwondo. He wanted to do well enough to earn at least one title, and he did it. He is the 2022 New Jersey State Champion in Forms and in Weapons. He crushed the field in Forms, but Weapons was close, only two points separated him [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, We let G3 skip school on Friday so that we could drive down to North Carolina for one final tournament this season. I know you would not have approved. In fact, I could hear you reprimanding me for interrupting his education. Missing school was something you always frowned upon—until I allowed G3 to [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, It’s been two years since you died. How am I still not okay with this? How is part of my brain still expecting you to come home? How is it that I still sometimes randomly catch myself crying when I think of you? I can’t believe it has been two full years. Most [&hellip;]</p>

<p>Dear Dad, We had an exceptionally busy weekend, but I got out New Jersey for a day so I was happy. G3 had a tournament up in Andover, Massachusetts. To avoid traffic and to avoid getting in too late, we opted to pull him out of school early so that we could get on the [&hellip;]</p>