Second Degree Black Belt

Dear Dad,

You would be so proud of your grandson. Yesterday, he tested for and earned his second degree black belt. I wish you could have been there to watch him, you would have been in awe over how well he did. Two years ago, on Father’s Day weekend, when he tested for his first degree belt you missed it. You were very disappointed you couldn’t be there, but you had booked a cruised on the Nile and you and Mom were flying home from Egypt when G3 tested. He was sad you couldn’t be there, but you promised him that nothing would stand in your way of being there for his next big belt milestone. Unfortunately, death is stronger than a promise. I know if COVID hadn’t kill you, you would have been there cheering him on. It’s awful that every new achievement in G3’s life is now shadowed by your absence.

For his test he had to do his form — the form which he has been competing with for more than a year. We had no doubt that he would pass that component. When you perform well enough to place second in districts and third — twice in a row — in a second degree ring, testing isn’t much of a challenge. He isn’t yet as strong in sparring as he is in forms, but we’ve learned over the years that the bar is lower during a test than it is in a tournament. However, to make it more interesting, he had to spar two of his instructors. He didn’t need to defeat them, he only needed to prove that he was competent. The scoring is based on a rubric, and the judges look to make sure he is doing certain things — like faking and blocking. While he sparred, the other kids beat their hands on the mat and clapped, setting a rhythm to support him and cheer him on. 

Finally, he had to break three boards — two using hand techniques and one with a kick. He got to choose what he wanted to do. For his hands, he chose a back fist punch and a palm heel strike. For the kick, his instructor challenged him to do a running jump side kick in which he had to jump over two shields. In short, he was putting on a show and he enjoyed every moment of it. He broke the first board with his fist then he missed the palm heel strike — but he did break it easily on his second attempt. However, his kick was the most impressive. He looked like he was flying. He took a few running steps, launched himself into the air, and his foot went right through the board. I can’t believe he kicked and broke a board that was as high as his head. His instructor’s wife took a slow-motion video and I probably watched it a dozen times. I texted it to Mom so that she could see him. If there had been a way to text it to you as well, I would have.

G3 didn’t need to perform his sword form for his test, but since it was taught this cycle and since the other students needed to perform it for their mid-terms, his instructor had him do a demonstration. The sword form is one of the reasons we switched — three years ago — to an ATA school. Learning traditional Taekwondo wasn’t enough. G3 was itching to learn weapons. As soon as he earned his black belt, he asked his instructor to teach him the sword form which he learned in addition to everything else he needed to learn for his various mid-terms. His form is now graceful and smooth, and he had the mat to himself as he showed off his skill to the spectators.  

Before G3’s instructor presented him with his new belt, he said a few complimentary words. He told G3 that he likes the fact that he is always pushing himself, always wanting to learn something new and improve what already knows. When it was our turn to speak, I deferred to Kati. When G3 earned his first degree belt, I prepared a short speech. I figured it wouldn’t be fair if I spoke each time. But Kati also scoffed at me for writing a speech when most parents just say a few words — but hey, it’s not every day your kid accomplishes something big and I like writing. Kati did not prepare a speech, but she did tell G3 we were both very proud of him.

After the test, we took pictures and then G3 stepped back onto the mat and started doing the second degree form — the form he isn’t even supposed to start learning until his next class. Apparently, just from watching the other competitors in his ring, he learned almost the first two lines (there are eight in total) of the new form. To give you an indication of how impressive this is, at his level, students are given ten weeks to learn two lines. On average, it takes four cycles — forty weeks — to learn an entire new form. But as you probably have guessed, G3 will want to learn this form sooner than that so that he can start doing it at tournaments. I’m sure his instructor will have to tweak what he already knows, but his memory impresses me. He sure didn’t get it from me.

For dinner, we went out to celebrate. G3’s friend D and his family joined us. We went to the hibachi place in Somerville. Do you remember it? The last time G3 and I ate there was two years ago when you surprised me for my birthday. You showed up at my condo unexpectedly and I pulled G3 out of school so that he could spend the afternoon with you. I’m so glad I did; it was one of the last outings we had together. Anyway, G3 had a great time last night with his friend and his friend’s younger brother. The three boys laughed while the hibachi chef set a fire on the grill and then squirted water in all their mouths and sprayed their faces. The food was good and even the adults all seemed to enjoy conversing with each others.

The only thing that would have made today more perfect would have been your presence. 

I miss you!