Day 177

The Brain Garden started today. It was my son’s first day of fifth grade and we spent it at our favorite place — the beach. Seriously, what better classroom in all the world is there. It was quiet and peaceful and outdoors, so much better than a room with walls and bells. We kept our own pace, our own schedule, and we got follow the conversational tangents wherever they veered. Of course, there were a few moments when I had to step away, take a deep breath, and remind myself that it might take awhile for my son to adjust to our new relationship. We started with math, the subject we both like the least. I figured it would be good to save the fun stuff for later in the day. We nearly came to blows. My son even recommended we put our sparring gear on and go a few rounds. We didn’t (considering my gear is in New Jersey). Eventually, we tackled the place value review, completed a few practice problems and moved on. He already knows much of what is in the first few chapters of the Social Studies textbook. I guess that’s what you get when your mother is a history nerd and drags you from one historical site to the next. I figured instead of content, maybe I’d focus on life skills. And so we read the first lesson together and I started to teach him how to take notes in outline form. I expected a rebellion. Instead, he actually seemed to like the activity. It was something different. A way for him to begin organizing information. And it doesn’t matter what he studies in the future, note taking skills are something he’ll need, not just for studying but for writing research papers. For reading, I introduced the Hobbit, had my son look up and write down some vocabulary words and then he took his book and wandered down to the water to read. His thoughts after one day, “This is better than Harry Potter and Percy Jackson.” Hopefully, his excitement and enthusiasm will stretch beyond the first ten pages. Writing I want to be fun. For me it always is, but my son hasn’t had any interest in anything but poetry since Dad died. This afternoon, I introduced the art of micro essays. I had my son brainstorm highlights from our Great Lakes trip. His highlights were different than mine but this is his story he should tell the tales he enjoyed most. Maybe I’ll write an essay too. It would be interesting to see how the same trip can result in different tellings.  We ended with science, a textbook that thus far bored the both of us. I’m hoping it gets more interesting as we move through the chapters.

As per my son’s request, there was no homework after the first day, but tomorrow that will change. I didn’t want to over tax him on day one. Shortly after we put our books away, I got an email from my son’s former school. They finally sent me the ISBN numbers I requested weeks ago in order to buy the proper textbooks. How nice of them. Didn’t they realize that it would take days for book orders to come through. It’s like they intentionally wanted to screw us over. What angers me is that it appears we got the wrong Science book after hours of research and trying to find the right one. Oh well, I will teach him from the textbook we have. At this age, science isn’t foundational and various districts follow different programs anyway. As for Math, we went with a different program altogether, following a better district. As long as I hit the standards, that’s all that matters. 

This evening, after a six month absence, my son returned to the taekwondo mat. I had to watch through the window from outside — due to covid restrictions. But I was impressed. There wasn’t much rust on the kid at all, and the little that was there he blew off by the end of the night. Surprisingly, with just a few nudges from his instructors, he remembered his entire first degree form. And he looked crisp and sharp — maybe not as crisp as he was back in March, but definitely sharper than I expected after six months of not throwing a kick. And he had fun. He walked out of class sweaty and smiling. On the drive back to Mattituck, we called his other mother and he talked the entire way home. He told her all about his class and added, “I really missed sweating and playing with weapons.” He was happy. After months of sorrow and sadness, it felt good to seem him excited and smiling. He can’t wait to go back tomorrow.