51st Anniversary

Dear Dad,

I’m sorry, I haven’t written in awhile. We were away this summer and then school started up and I’ve been too depressed to write. Allegedly, there is a teacher shortage. But I question the validity of that since I remain unemployed. In the last month, I’ve applied to dozens of school districts. Mostly, they ignore me. Unless my friend—Lauren, you probably remember her, she hosted my baby shower—knows someone in the district, I don’t even get a call. I’m not sure why. Perhaps there are several factors at play, but I’m beginning to wonder if it is due to the fact that my graduate work makes me more expensive. Twice now, I haven’t gotten a full time job despite the fact that I thought the interviews went well. Even though neither district wanted me for full time work, they were very quick to contact me for long term sub positions, positions for which they could pay me a fraction of what they would have to pay me if they hired me full time. If they want me for part-time pay, they they must like me. Right? They just don’t want to pay me a decent salary if they they can find someone cheaper. I also interviewed at a private school, and job I would have loved, but they din’t want me either. 

G3 is back in school. I can’t say I’m pleased. He’s been back for two weeks and he hasn’t done anything in English class. His teacher is giving them worksheets that are more appropriate for third graders in an attempt to teacher the students cursive. I recognize it’s an important skill, and kids should know it, but it is not seventh grade standard. Besides, G3 has been writing cursive since first grade. The worksheets are a complete waste of time for him. It seems teachers are perfectly capable of differentiating instruction when it comes to kids who need extra help, but the the teachers in Middlesex aren’t educated or experienced enough to know hot to differentiate in a way that helps smart kids. G3 is bored is class, and the teachers are clueless about how to keep him engaged. Last week, his English teacher showed them a movie. How lazy do you have to be to show students a movie this early in the school year? In history his has a long term sub. Lovely! That means he isn’t really being taught anything. However, that’s no different than last year when all his teacher did was show Youtube videos every day. The worksheets he gets for homework are so bloody boring they put me to sleep—and I love history. I am no longer surprised that so many students hate history. How can anyone find it interesting when they are forced to read material that is so dry and respond to questions that aren’t mentally stimulating? 

Yesterday, we went down to Maryland for a tournament. You would have been extremely proud of G3. For the first time ever, he took first place in all his individual events: forms, weapons, combat, and sparring. What amazed me the most is that he competed with the Gumdo (two handed sword) for the first time. He learned the form three years ago but he hadn’t revisited it until a month ago when he decided that maybe he should switch weapons. He really enjoyed the double bahng-mahng-ee and he put in an inordinate amount of time practicing them, but the judges never seemed to score him high—even though it is a complex form. The judges seem to prefer the Gumdo. At least, kids who do the Gumdo always seemed to score higher. So I suggested to G3 that he might want to try the Gumdo. Yes, he likes the double bahng-mahng-ee, but he likes winning even more. So, he took my advice—I’m still surprised—watched a video on Youtube to remind himself of the form, and because he has an amazing memory—and yes, I’m a little jealous of it—he was comfortable with the form in less than a two hours. His Gumdo instructor helped him with it one day in class, and despite it still being new, and somewhat rough, he decided to compete with it. To my untrained eye, it did not look like the first time he did the form in competition. It did not look like a form he learned just for the hell of it. And apparently the judges agreed because he took first place. Of course if he his going to continue to win, and even place at higher level tournaments, he will need to continue practicing. We also scheduled a lesson for him next month to work on fine tuning it even further.

More surprising than taking first place with a weapon he just learned was taking first in combat and sparring. A year ago, he didn’t even compete in combat because he didn’t train enough in it and he always lost the first round. He didn’t have any fun getting clobbered. But now that combat is a priority in class, and now that he has learned more about proper technique and strategy, he is more competitive. Yesterday, in the first round, he had to combat spar a kid who was at least a head taller than him—and height is always an advantage. Kati and I didn’t think he had a chance of winning, but we were wrong. He beat the tall kid and then went on to win the next two rounds. In traditional sparring, he’s also gotten much better since we switched schools. He’s more aggressive and he’s better at evading and blocking. True, the ring this year is not as competitive as it was last year. The boys aren’t as big, nor are they as strong, but if we hadn’t moved to a new school, I think he would still been losing. Being able to do well now, even in a less competitive ring, is building his confidence which is what he needs most when it comes to sparring. Last year, he was fearful and timid. This year, he no longer defeats himself before stepping onto the mat.  

Today is your wedding anniversary. If you had lived, you and Mom would have gone out to dinner to celebrate 51 years. Without you, it was a lonely day for Mom. She had a mass said for you in church and spent her doing church activities. The busier she was, the less time she had to sit home and be sad. I can’t believe this is the third anniversary she’s had to spend without you. 

I miss you!