Day 155

Last night during the Democratic National Conversation a memorial tribute to Covid victims aired. I had sent in Dad’s picture to be included but he wasn’t. Do you have any idea how shitty that felt? It hurts when my writing gets rejected. But to have Dad rejected from a tribute really gutted me. Why wasn’t he important enough? Why were the others more important than him?

I was part of a support group on Facebook. Many of their loved ones were included. They were excited and celebrating on the support group page. I expressed my pain over Dad not being included and other members berated me. They said I was selfish thinking only of myself. They told me I was being unfair and unreasonable. What kind of support group is that. I left the group.

I’ve been up all night crying. Dad meant the world to me. But to everyone else he is just a number. I know I tend to be overly sensitive but this is the coldest and cruelest rejection I’ve experienced. Why are some victims deemed more worthy than others? Why does my father have to remain faceless when others were given a face?

I must admit, I’m not feeling warmly about the Democrats at the moment. Yes, Trump and the Republicans killed my dad but now the Democrats have cast him aside.

Only a year ago, Dad was so excited to take my son to camp. He was so good to us. It’s not fair that he died.